Promises Promises

You know when you little how your parents promise to take you somewhere and when the day arrives for some reason you don't go? You know how you felt? Well growing up I always tried to never promise something that I could not keep. When we planned our trip I promised the kids would have a wonderful time-broken. I promised that we would go places and see things that would make us want to stay-broken. I promised them that on the weekend relatives would take us to the zoo as unlike the US it only cost 1.50 for a whole family to go-broken. I promised my son high-speed internet so we could stay in touch with friends and family-finally got that one after a month. It has been horrible the past few days here. I tried to explain that unlike my Libyan counterparts, women in the USA go outside the home. I mean my sister-in-law goes to her parents house and has visitors. And the language isn't an issue so she has no problem staying around the house for days on end. She also has a toddler. I have five growing children who are use to going to the parks and playing outside girls and boys. The boys are pretty much able to run free, but it is not proper for the girls to be out without their brothers. Ok, tell me of one teenage boy who likes to be around his sister.
Not wanting a problem I have stayed up in my apartment the last few days. Last night my mother-in-law asked me to come out. I went down and told her I was not feeling very happy so I had stayed inside. Why did I not sit outside? What's the blame difference! Sitting is sitting no matter where you do it. If I'm going to be pissed I'm better off alone. Last week I had promised the kids we would take the cab and go to the zoo. Seeing as that week was clash of the titans we didn't go. Even though a large group of American ladies were to meet that day at the zoo without transportation how was I to go. I told my brother-in-law and he promised that we would go soon and all enjoy the zoo together. Well here it is a week later and we still have not gone. I really regret taking the kids here without their dad. I have done my best to respect the family and not speak ill of them, but how do you encourage someone to stay here if you lock them inside and toss the keys. I know this is how women live here. But I see plenty walking the streets and alleys each day from the windows of my home. So why are they out? Is it just my family that stays inside all day sweeping endlessly and sleeping all day long. I know of siestas but this is ridicules. I tried to tell them I don't mind staying inside but the girls especially want to go out and at least go swimming. That is free and walking distance. No, its too hot or not the time for girls to swim. Or sorry it is too late to go now.
Anyway I was speaking outside with my mother-in-law trying to tell her I understand this is her life, but it isn't my life. I don't want to disrespect the family but I need social interaction at least. But apparently except for my other sister-in-law's house I can't go to visit other people. There are neighbors who speak English but we are not allow to visit them for some unexplained reason. I got a few movies on the one outing I did get this week. I was crying most of the day and a sister came and took me out. We of course walked and the girls desperate for going out just had to come and two of her kids joined us. Well I had been looking for something for my tomgirl to wear as they keep talking of a party that has yet to materialize. So we hit the stores on the opposite side of the main street. She had made my brother-in-law batty the last time going out as why cant you find something. You just need a dress. Yeah a dress for a girl who hates dresses. Jeans are the new style with the horrible cropped legs that only twiggy can wear. And she is heavy so nothing can come above the thighs. Even though she has probably lost 10 or more pounds since we have been here she is still large in the legs. No dressing rooms and any mom with a tomboy knows how it is just to get them to try on something that even remotely resembles a girlie outfit. I finally found a pant set that had a stretch waist with baggy legs and ordered her to try it on. She was almost in tears and the kids were running amok around the store. My children know better but being locked up all week they misbehaved as well. I was totally embarrassed as to their behavior. Well I knew there was a CD store down the street and the kids pointed it out and we crossed the street. You remember holding hands with kids to cross a busy street no way! My sisters daughter ran across the street in oncoming traffic and I almost had a heart attack. What's the problem? Oh that it is getting late and maybe a car would not see her. Well we got to the store and it was prayer time so the store was temporarily closed and we stood and waited for the man to return. It was getting dark and I know how dad feels about being out after dark. Finally the man returned and we found a quick collection of movies that we could watch. Six movies for 4 dollars. That's to buy folks. So yesterday I sat all day watching them. One was no good as the picture was gone about halfway through the disk. Ok can one of you boys go return it? No, why do we have to do it. Anyway later I was ushered outside and after a bit my father in law came up. First time I had seen him in two days. I greeted him and he looked at me in anger. How do I greet him now. Where was I all day. I tried to explain that I was sad and had stayed upstairs cleaning and doing laundry. No, why didn't I come down and sit with the family. I told him I was sick of sitting. I needed to go out and what was there to do downstairs anyways. Oh there was plenty to do. Sweeping the carpets and cement and cooking. My brother-in-law and his wife were leaving tomorrow and who was going to cook now? Hell how do I know. The one day I did cook no one ate it. Or they were polite but I know it wasn't how they like it but were trying to be kind. Well think how we feel. We have been here a month an the kids hate most of the meals. A big bowl of pasta with one or two small pieces of bone with a touch of meat on them for 7 people. Yummy, cant wait for dinner. How about fish stew with the heads still on. Yummy, when only two people in your family like fish. The kids were grossed out with the heads and refused to eat. I had given my brother 100 dollars to buy meat with. Why did we need meat? Did we not eat meat? NO......We haven't. But I guess I upset my father in law again. When you have a diabetic daughter pastas are hazardous to her health and I told them we need protein as much to help counter the sugars. No one has listened. So I have to guard her carefully. Beans also the kids hate. Life is so much fun. Beware of what you ask for you just might get it.