Sugar and Spices

No, this one is not what you think it is about. This one is about telling it like it really is. Before coming to Libya I spent a great deal of time trying to learn all I could about what to expect of life here as compared to life in the USA. I spoke to people on the internet who lived here and people who had lived here and ones who had visited in the past and recently. I thought I was pretty prepared for most any situation I could encounter.
I guess I have got screwy wires or something. Its not the place or the people but the situations you can be in that you have no control over. I heard that most of the American ladies that came before me had a rough time adjusting to life here and how each one had made it through and stayed here in Libya or at least wanted to visit it again.
Thing is no one ever told me exactly what went wrong with their trip or stay. Well you all know that I am here alone with five kids. None of whom speak Arabic beyond hi and how are you. I have a good feel for the language but my speaking is limited and I don't always get everything that someone is saying. So, I felt at least I had a better chance than most ladies who came without one word of Arabic under their belt. At least they had their hubbies to help out with the translating. Most tell of being restricted from going out or doing things that we were use to before and having hubbies that revert back no matter how long they have lived outside of Libya.
I don't know if any other woman came with children other than toddlers to Libya, beyond a visit. If so I would have loved to have spoken with you more.
It is not that my husbands parents and family are not wonderful people they really are good people with the best of intentions. Its just in the USA I am the one who takes charge of all the family needs beyond earning the money to pay the bills. I may not be perfect at it but I did it. Take away that and you have nothing. I did all my housework at home with little effort. Everything is available here if you can afford it. It may not be in your city or it may cost more but in general you can now get anything. Here is more of why do you need that? When sweeping the carpet with a broom can get it done why do you need a vacuum? Mops are a joke a rag over a squeegee and if you don't have a bucket you keep running back to the sink to rinse. Courtyards are always needing to be swept and washed off. Except for the sweeping part why do you need to wash cement?
Most will find you are also locked up for a bit. Ok, I had gotten use to staying home but day after day is capable of driving someone batty. If your family is not very social as mine are you can go crazy even faster if you cannot speak with people and no TV with english you can go nuts. I got so depressed lately I stayed inside my apartment for the last two days. I really do like it here but I need to get out. No one wants to go anywhere and all the men who are suposed to be taking you places hate to do it. You sit all day waiting for someone to think it is now cool enough to go out and they say oh I want to go see my friends. Why should I have to take them out? Even though Libya is modern and women are allowed to drive here, you may want to think twice about driving for a bit. Unless you are accustom to a large metropolitan city with way to many cars, you may find that a taxi or relatives may be the best shot for transportation for a bit. Don't rely on hubby either. If he needs a job he will be gone til around 4 pm each day. I found most things I need are within walking distance of the home but I have yet to see those cute carts the old ladies use anywhere in Libya. Add it to your bring it list. As for electronics or modern conviences. Yeah they have it all again it is a matter of money and availability. I have yet to see a boombox in a local store. The ones I have seen they say costed a few hundred dollars or more and even the smallest ones are very expensive. You can bring your own but get a good quality power converter before you come. Bring a few things like your cellphones and hairdryers and most any electronic item will need them and if you got kids try listening to them bicker over who gets the converter next. Computers are very cheap here but I need to warn you of quality here. There are many imitations here. I sent my son out for a boombox and he brought back what I first thought was a Panasonic. Ok, then I looked more closely at the spelling somehow it was wrong. Panasoninic was how it was spelled. Fake. And get to know the shops, if you need to return something there are no receipts so hope you have a honest dealer. So far that hasn't been an issue. Clothing and household items are also interesting. They have some of the latest fashions here but most are Asian imports. Beware of quality again. I had a pair of pants that split the seam 20 minutes after my daughter put them on. There are seamstresses in town so if you don't sew, you can get them repaired. I would bring my own sewing machine if you own one. The only one I have seen so far was a old handcrank model from maybe the early 1900's. Still working as it was metal. Not electronic. You can get all the latest movies and music if you look around but quality can again be an issue. Most are copies so they are very cheap but you may pay for the fact they wont work on an older dvd player. I have two that I bought last year and they could not read them. Also they have no controls functioning so no skipping through them. And they have Arabic subtitles on many of them. Music is another item. Yes you can find most of the popular singers but again it is copies. Mostly from TV programs from what I have found locally. Ask around, better yet bring your own. Finally medicines. You can get just about anything at the corner markets that have a pharmacy in them. No prescription needed so be careful if you have teens who could be using drugs or over the counter meds. Bring what you can if you have medical issues that would be safer. Then find one of those books that tell you what a medication can do. It is handy. But I don't encourage self medication for someone who does not know medications. My niece was sick yesterday with a fever and I prefer home remedies and herbs if possible. Ginger will take a fever down as well as peppermint teas. If you don't have tylenol handy. I think I will begin posting some ideas from my books that I brought for anyone who needs something and cant find it. Oh well enough for now this one will probably get an add on but I need to let the son have the computer again. Bye for now.